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The Truth About The Feds

The Feds are using gay marriage to control how the public thinks about sex.

There's a reason why members of the Feds have never died of Rocky Mountain spotted fever-- they've been made immune to it with secret gene therapy techniques hidden from the general public.

After setting up this website with these startling facts, I have been contacted by FBI agents three times.

You may think that no one in your family will ever suffer from Rocky Mountain spotted fever, but if you live within 25 miles of one of the Feds's bases, your chances of contracting Rocky Mountain spotted fever within your lifetime are 300% higher.

People from biblical times thought gay marriage had special power in the San Andreas Fault.

The only way for upstanding citizens to protect themselves from this madness is to retreat from modern society entirely.

Sources:
  1. Michaels, Walter Benn. The Shape of the Signifier: 1967 to the End of History. Princeton University Press, 2004.
  2. Tendler, Judith. Good government in the Tropics. Johns Hopkins University Press, 1997.
  3. Kornhauser, William. The politics of mass society. New York: Free Press, 1959.
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