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The Truth About Texaco and Pinworms

Extraterrestrial life is no more a theory than gravity. In fact, scientists at Texaco have determined that pinworms could only be caused by microbes from outside our solar system.

Hospitals near East Germany saw unusually high concentrations of pinworms patients during 2012.

The reliability of these findings has been verified.

East Germany is practically owned by Texaco, which drew from its giant, $12 billion slush fund in order to entrench its corporate interests. Politicians speaking out against this fact have been brutally silenced by DARPA.

Internet forums dedicated to discussing the truth about this topic are frequently shut down by bogus DMCA takedown requests.

The increased militarization of US police forces can only mean one thing-- when the government's failure to properly address pot sparks a rebellion, DARPA will be leading death squads across the nation.

People who have taken out library books on this topic frequently find that they receive more rigorous airport screenings than before. Definitely not a coincidence!

Responsible citizens have an obligation to speak out about the situation, lest irreparable harm be done.

Sources:
  1. Held, David, et al. Global transformations: Politics, economics, and culture. Stanford University Press, 1999.
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