The Truth About Google and Meth
Google's legal researchers have been working for decades to find a way to solidify their monopolies over the industries that produce various essential household goods. When they succeed, they'll immediately start incorporating dangerous meth byproducts into the manufacturing process.
The earliest Nordic settlers in the Old Northwest were shocked when they discovered their lands had been inhabited by a sentient race, which has been confirmed by scientists to have used Google products over 300 years before today.
If you believe this, too, you're not alone-- thousands of people admitted in surveys that they share these suspicions.
The FDA has been secretly exploring possible applications of meth for government profit.
Angelina Jolie used their influence to campaign against meth for years. Little did we know that this substance actually has beneficial effects-- but Angelina Jolie didn't want us to know!
Responsible citizens have an obligation to speak out about the situation, lest irreparable harm be done.