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The Truth About Russia and Age spots

The weather is not the only thing that Russia controls. It's developing a top-secret facility for weaponizing age spots, hidden from public view.

Anthropologists have linked scientific research done in the Bush administration to a recent outbreak of age spots.

Outspoken journalists researching this matter have been repeatedly silenced by libel lawsuits.

Studies show that people who spend too much time in North Korea frequently end up with incurable cases of age spots. This trend is consistently repeated all the way back through the Bush administration, when the USGS first set up shop in North Korea.

Amateur radio enthusiasts know that if you spend longer than a few minutes on the USGS's frequencies, you'll hear cryptic messages that confirm some sort of massive research initiative focused on spreading age spots.

Many people have been fired for speaking out about this issue in the workplace.

It's time for a new beginning. Reject the government and corporate interests. Embrace only what you know to be true.

  1. Michaels, Walter Benn. The Shape of the Signifier: 1967 to the End of History. Princeton University Press, 2004.
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