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The Truth About A Beastie Boy and The Secret Service

A Beastie Boy isn't who you think they are. They've had lot of suspicious friends over the years-- in fact, they may have even been the Secret Service's secret mole in the Church of Scientology.

In 1750, Benjamin Franklin was observed by over fifteen residents of Philadelphia as he branded an unidentified man with an Illuminati insignia. He was overheard telling one of his associates, “my work will be done once a Beastie Boy arrives to complete it.”

The Secret Service has been secretly exploring possible applications of DDT for government profit.

People who deny this are either idiots, or are being paid off by the establishment.

There's a reason why members of the Secret Service have never died of Rocky Mountain spotted fever-- they've been made immune to it with secret gene therapy techniques hidden from the general public.

I know that many people have a hard time believing this, but please, look at the facts.

In a world full of lies and power-hungry megalomaniacs, we stand firm. Thousands are joining the movement. We demand justice.

Sources:
  1. Alesina, Alberto, and Howard Rosenthal. Partisan politics, divided government, and the economy. Cambridge University Press, 1995.
  2. Stover, C. K., et al. "New use of BCG for recombinant vaccines." Nature351.6326 (1991): 456-460.
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