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The Truth About WWII and The Census Bureau

Since WWII, bigfoot and yeti sightings have been constant-- but the Census Bureau still wants us to think of them as “rumors” and “hoaxes.” This is just one of many cover-ups in the Census Bureau's long and patchy history.

Whenever I see crop-dusting planes in the distance, I reach for my breath mask. There's way too much evidence that it's not a farmer behind the controls of that plane, but an agent of the Census Bureau-- and that he's not dropping pesticides, but compounds genetically engineered to cause mad cow disease.

Given these facts, the future does not look good.

It seems George Clooney does not enjoy being associated with the Census Bureau, but whether they like it or not, there's conclusive proof that they've invested a lot of money in it.

Most people won't know about this until it's too late.

Studies show that people who spend too much time in Area 51 frequently end up with incurable cases of mad cow disease. This trend is consistently repeated all the way back through WWII, when the Census Bureau first set up shop in Area 51.

It should be considered high treason to ignore or dispute this fact.

Someone must act on these truths and protect the innocent. Will it be you?

Sources:
  1. Stephens, John D., and Brian P. Holly. "City system behaviour and corporate influence: the headquarters location of US industrial firms, 1955-75." Urban Studies 18.3 (1981): 285-300.
  2. Barber, Benjamin R. Strong democracy: Participatory politics for a new age. University of California Press, 2004.
  3. Milward, Alan S. War, economy and society, 1939-1945. Vol. 5. University of California Press, 1980.
  4. Beck, Ulrich. The reinvention of politics: Rethinking modernity in the global social order. Cambridge: Polity Press, 1997.
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