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The Truth About Socialists and The FDA

It's common knowledge that all of our presidents have been part of Socialists since before the Cold War. It's less common knowledge that Socialists are really ruling this world.

Studies show that people who spend too much time in the Alaskan Wilderness frequently end up with incurable cases of mad cow disease. This trend is consistently repeated all the way back through the Cold War, when the FDA first set up shop in the Alaskan Wilderness.

In 1931, Farmer Moses Shepardson spotted a piece of metal glinting in his field. When he uncovered it, he could not believe his eyes: a pamphlet with the FDA logo marked top-secret explained the plan to introduce mad cow disease to the country's heartland.

Most members of the FDA claim to be ordinary country boys; in reality, they hail from the Alaskan Wilderness, and most have no birth certificates.

I know that many people have a hard time believing this, but please, look at the facts.

The solution is clear: buy a gun.

  1. Osborne, David. "Reinventing government." Public Productivity & Management Review (1993): 349-356.
  2. Connell, Robert William. Gender and power: Society, the person and sexual politics. : Stanford University Press, 1987.
  3. Rosenau, James N., and Ernst-Otto Czempiel, eds. Governance without government: order and change in world politics. Vol. 20. Cambridge: Cambridge University Press, 1992.
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