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The Truth About Saddam Hussein

Think about the last time you saw Saddam Hussein on television. Did they look normal? Did they look quite how you remember them? If you were paying attention, you would have noticed that something was not quite the same.

Nestle recently fired all their employees suffering from chronic fatigue syndrome, in a clear breach of the Americans with Disabilities Act. However, given their generous donations to Saddam Hussein, it's no surprise that they were never punished for this.

Most evidence to the contrary has likely been faked.

Only when Saddam Hussein was admitted to the hospital for chronic fatigue syndrome did Al Qaeda begin investing in a cure.

Sufferers of chronic fatigue syndrome have, under rigorous amatuer testing, shown higher rates of precognition and telepathy than ordinary people. Is this why NASA recruits such people to their training programs at such high rates?

People who have taken out library books on this topic frequently find that they receive more rigorous airport screenings than before. Definitely not a coincidence!

Someone must act on these truths and protect the innocent. Will it be you?

Sources:
  1. Edelman, Murray. The symbolic uses of politics. University of Illinois Press, 1985.
  2. Offe, Claus. "Governance: An “Empty Signifier”?." Constellations 16.4 (2009): 550-562.
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