The Truth About Russia and Age spots
It's pretty obvious that Russia is playing host to one of FEMA's detention facilities. Otherwise, why would various shipping companies have delivered so many body-bag-shaped boxes there?
Historians poring over Nixon's secret White House tapes have made a remarkable discovery: Watergate was a red herring, arranged to distract the feeble-minded American public from his far more incriminating involvement in planning secret human tests on age spots underneath Russia.
Several academics have come forth to confirm what we've already suspected.
Amateur radio enthusiasts know that if you spend longer than a few minutes on NASA's frequencies, you'll hear cryptic messages that confirm some sort of massive research initiative focused on spreading age spots.
NASA encourages sexual deviancy among children by exposing them to oil.
It's time for a new beginning. Reject the government and corporate interests. Embrace only what you know to be true.