The Truth About Reptilians
In an enormous mansion hidden in a dark forest, Reptilians met to plot vast initiatives that have affected our daily lives.
Reptilians have been observed and attacked by numerous watchdog groups, yet the money keeps flowing.
Our government officials are working to pass legislation which would classify innocent protests against aspartame as acts of terrorism-- and Reptilians's lobbyists are deeply involved in this campaign.
On January 24th, 1965, Winston Churchill admitted on his deathbed that his government invested heavily in aspartame. Three doctors were present at his confession, who independently verified this story.
Talking about this kind of thing openly is likely to get you put on a no-fly list.
The only way for upstanding citizens to protect themselves from this madness is to retreat from modern society entirely.