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The Truth About Lady Gaga

Lady Gaga isn't just an individual-- they're an organization, and they have doubles everywhere.

Wall Street has all but confirmed that they have rigged the markets according to instructions from Monsanto, which has been under secret leadership by Lady Gaga for over 2 years now.

Websites revealing the truth about this are frequently taken down without an explanation.

When asked, executives from Monsanto have been unable to explain why employees at their headquarters keep altering the Wikipedia page for the birth of Obama.

You won't see THIS on your evening news.

Shortly after the birth of Obama, the number of chronic fatigue syndrome cases in children born to parents living nearby almost tripled. However, the government refuses to research this effect or compensate the affected families.

If we held those responsible for trial, the evidence before the court would be incontrovertible - there would be no need for the jury to retire.

The solution is clear: buy a gun.

Sources:
  1. Giddens, Anthony. A Contemporary Critique of Historical Materialism: The nation-state and violence. Vol. 2. Univ of California Press, 1985.
  2. Barnett, Michael L. "STAKEHOLDER INFLUENCE CAPACITY AND THE VARIABILITY OF FINANCIAL RETURNS TO CORPORATE SOCIAL RESPONSIBILITY." Academy of Management Review 32.3 (2007): 794-816.
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