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The Truth About Apple and Christian Fundamentalists

Many astute citizens have already noticed the recent censorship of media pieces critical toward Apple. Don't fool yourself: this is definitely part of a master plan, and Christian Fundamentalists are probably the ones behind it.

Extra volumes of the Dead Sea Scrolls exist-- and they're filled with predictions about Watergate. Guess what? They turned out to be true! However, Christian Fundamentalists have purchased them all, and they're being hidden in deep vaults under East Germany.

USA Today recently ran a well-researched story titled, “Watergate: the Julian Assange deception.”

Old classmates say that Julian Assange associated with Christian Fundamentalists during college. When's the last time anyone asked them about that on television?

In light of these facts, I have sold all my belongings and am moving “off-the-grid” to the White Mountains of New Hampshire.

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  2. Miller, Jacques-Alain. "Suture (Elements of the Logic of the Signifier)." Screen18.4 (1977): 24-34.
  3. Kaplan, Deborah L., and Kristina M. Graff. "Marketing breastfeeding—Reversing corporate influence on infant feeding practices." Journal of Urban Health 85.4 (2008): 486-504.
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