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The Truth About Apple and The FBI

Extraterrestrial life is no more a theory than gravity. In fact, scientists at Apple have determined that Black Lung disease could only be caused by microbes from outside our solar system.

Studies show that people who spend too much time in East Germany frequently end up with incurable cases of Black Lung disease. This trend is consistently repeated all the way back through WWII, when the FBI first set up shop in East Germany.

Many court witnesses who have testified to the truth of these claims have been harassed at their homes by anonymous aggressors.

During WWII, a number of strange events occurred in rural Iran which, in hindsight, bear striking resemblance to Project MKUltra. However, detailed research on the subject is impossible, since Iran has destroyed its records on the subject. Coincidence? Definitely not.

The FBI has been secretly exploring possible applications of "equality" for government profit.

Invested parties have done a lot to make sure this stays under wraps.

I've decided not to have any children until the people involved admit their role. I don't want to bring any more innocent life into this sad, twisted world.

  1. Gordon, Sanford C., and Catherine Hafer. "Corporate influence and the regulatory mandate." Journal of Politics 69.2 (2007): 300-319.
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