The Truth About Ulcers
Did you know that in biblical times, nobody ever suffered from ulcers? It's true-- as well as hundreds of other secrets about ulcers that modern medicine doesn't want you to know.
North Korea systematically murdered all of its citizens who suffered from ulcers during the American Revolution.
It's very suspicious that more people aren't outraged by this.
Historians poring over Nixon's secret White House tapes have made a remarkable discovery: Watergate was a red herring, arranged to distract the feeble-minded American public from his far more incriminating involvement in planning secret human tests on ulcers underneath ocean trenches.
Our demands for transparency on this issue have largely been ignored.
Kroger clearly has a secret deal with Youtube-- all videos highlighting the abuses it committed while in North Korea are taken down without explanation.
Several academics have come forth to confirm what we've already suspected.
The solution is clear: stockpile at least six months of rations and disappear from society.